A slightly dysfunctional summer and a slightly dysfunctional mind.

Recently, I have been helplessly inactive. Well in the intellectual sense, to be exact. This brings me to this following thought: It is quite astonishing how easy it is for humans to break promises, even when made to themselves. At the beginning of this summer, the date which marked July 1st, I promised myself one thing; to have a productive summer. One where I nourished my soul with literature, fed my hunger for knowledge with biographies, and matured my writing skills. I set up a few books to read. Well, to be quite honest, they were around twenty-two books. Among them beautifully written novels written by authors who were celebrated generations and generations after they were deceased.  Each book discovered a new dimension, a space in which you would hang high above, loosely, dwelling over the beauty of the detailed descriptions. I was overwhelmed at first, then I constructed a list and saved it on my Desktop naming it with sheer excitement, "Books to read this Summer."


Over a month and a half has passed since the beginning of my summer holiday. Clearly I haven't kept that promise to myself. I left my list abandoned. I can't help but feel like a worthless rag. Either way, I have decided to start writing some sort of journal. It will contain my daily slash weekly slash monthly frustrations. That sounds quite pessimistic. Alright, it will also contain my rare triumphs and all my euphoric moments.


I am beginning to read a psychology book which investigates human personalities. I figured that being the judgmental freak that I am, a characteristic which always gets me in some sort of trouble, I will learn through this book to understand why other people behave a certain way. It always baffles me how everyone is the same, but they're not. That sounds a bit corny, but it's a way to sum it all up, I guess? The theories state that "...everybody goes through the same phases of growth to maturity." When I first read this, I smiled smugly. Then to think about it, we do. All humans experience pain, joy, love etc. in some form or manner. Some forms are more dysfunctional than others. Some are intensified while others aren't. Either way, everyone goes about the same experiences and that's probably why the modern world fell in love with Romeo and Juliet or Macbeth or or or... (Stories which originated hundreds of years ago.) Each of these portray human emotions that every individual must have came through during their lifetime, no matter what era or language. It is something they can relate to and humans always seek to make connections. Even if it's passion, love or the thirst for power and status.


As youngsters, we are spoon-fed fairy tale after fairy tale, oblivious to the fact that we are learning the very nature of humans. The obedience of Snow White, the ignorance of Little Red Riding Hood, the rebellious Robin Hood and so on. These stories grow to influence our expectations and the way we set out our life. Back to the book, now. The book talks about 32 different types of characters who have different combinations of "Introversion, Sensation, Intuition, Thinking, Feeling, Perceiving, Judging."  After a not-so-short questionnaire and a few calculations, you are given a four-lettered "Type."  Apparently I am a "INTJ" which therefore states that I am a "strategist" and that I "analyze the alternatives." INTJ's are also proven to be "life's independent thinkers."  "They have original minds and drive for implementing their ideas and achieving their goals."


I'll continue reading this book and hopefully, soon I'll be able to make accurate judgments. Cue theatrical music.